Wednesday, July 19, 2006

MODERN ART IS ELEPHANT POOP

The Upper Room- Cris Ofili
PROMISE-No more 'discussions' on art funding.
Do you remember the demonstration, 'Modern art is bullshit'? Well it was when a wheelbarrow of cow manure was dumped outside The Royal Academy because of an exhibition featuring Chris Ofili's work. In 1998 he won The Turner Prize
with, 'No women no cry', which had elephant dung attached to it and it was stood on elephant dung. A lot of people were not happy with it. He also p-ssed off a lot of people with his Virgin Mary collage which had pictures of genitalia taken from magazines and stuck onto the picture. I think some of Frida Kahlo's work is very cutting edge but I don't hear bitching about that.
Not only do I think his work is brilliant but it is also brilliant because it p-sses off snot nosed artists and critics. Wouldn't the world be a boring place if all artists were Fine Artists, what a waste of ceativity.
I watched a program the other night about the making of cave paintings and part of the program was about spitting the 'paint' onto the wall and causing a stencil effect. Imagine the response today from the purists! Their blood pressure would need monitoring.
As a kind of acid test, years ago I remember somebody sending in a painting their toddler had createsd to the Summer Exhibition at the Royal Academy. It was merely splashes of paint and they had titled it Monkeys in the Trees. It was accepted. You've got to love it.
I definitely do not have the talent of a fine artist but I would say I had creativity. Damien Hirst
is hugely talented as a portrait painter but it is definitely his modern art that has made him famous(and wealthy!).
Anyway, I think Beauty's artwork is better, being unbiased of course!
So to all the purists out there- BITE ME!

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An Irish Blessing

(A Blessing from St. Patrick)
May the road rise to meet you,

May the wind be always at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon your face,

May the rains fall soft upon your fields,

And, until we meet again,

May God hold you in the hollow of His hand.